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submitted 5 months ago by SandbagTiara2816@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/memes@lemmy.ml

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[-] stinerman@midwest.social 143 points 5 months ago

I'm O- so I give two units of red cells and get saline and the plasma/antibodies back. The guy at the donation site says "make sure you don't drink any alcoholic beverages for 24 hours...but you can have one if you want." He looks back to see if his manager is around and then whispers "you can have two but don't leave the house."

[-] TheOakTree@lemm.ee 14 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I can't say I have something as useful as O-, but at least I can still do Power Red donos... though I forget if I'm A or B negative.

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[-] ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.world 131 points 5 months ago

Quick way of finding out if your date has any STIs.

[-] BenVimes@lemmy.ca 47 points 5 months ago

At least last time I donated blood in my country (Canada), you could discretely indicate "do not use" by applying a different sticker to the bag. This was done in case someone got peer pressured into donating but didn't want to reveal something private that would have disqualified them otherwise.

[-] emergencyfood@sh.itjust.works 10 points 5 months ago

We (India) don't have that, mainly because blood bags don't grow on trees, but there's a question about sleeping eight hours the previous night that always seemed irrelevant. Now that I think about it, it might have been added for this purpose.

[-] saigot@lemmy.ca 10 points 5 months ago

Yes but they also test the blood and will call you if they have reason to believe you are positive.

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[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 34 points 5 months ago

And/or is a rapist

[-] ryannathans@aussie.zone 33 points 5 months ago

Or is gay

[-] ProdigalFrog@slrpnk.net 24 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Gay people can donate blood now! (In the US, at least) :D

Also @photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com

[-] LethalSmack@lemmy.world 26 points 5 months ago

Sort of. Still can’t donate if you’re taking prep (hiv preventative) or if you’ve had sex with multiple people.

Need to be off prep for 3 months and not have sex with new or multiple partners.

The no prep part is a tough ask. Especially with how healthcare is

Much better than it was but it still excludes a huge portion of the community

[-] HenriVolney@sh.itjust.works 8 points 5 months ago

In my country, men are asked the same questions and no one is allowed to give blood if they changed partners in the last 3 months. I imagine it is the same for women.

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[-] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 11 points 5 months ago

Not everyone lives in America.

[-] stinerman@midwest.social 8 points 5 months ago

On the internet, everyone is American.

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago

Possibly an American canine, at that

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[-] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 14 points 5 months ago

Not really how this works. Tests take time and they don't test immediately, also they do pool tests, so multiple samples are mixed and tested. So even if they'd find something they couldn't tell you right there, and then again even if they could they would tell you it would be handled so that nobody else could notice.

[-] Kiosade@lemmy.ca 60 points 5 months ago

People are so weird in their obsession with alcohol and getting drunk…

[-] stinerman@midwest.social 51 points 5 months ago

I felt this way at one time when I was younger. Now I don't give a shit what people want to do with their own bodies.

[-] Donkter@lemmy.world 38 points 5 months ago

I think what you're missing is that getting drunk is very fun.

[-] Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world 12 points 5 months ago

This is it.

Some people drink 1 tequila, do a Hangover, and go, "Drinking is bad" smh

[-] Boxtifer@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

To be fair, alcohol is a poison.

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[-] ipkpjersi@lemmy.ml 30 points 5 months ago

It's fun if you don't overdo it, as long as it's not an obsession and as long as it doesn't interfere with your life. Like all things, moderation is key.

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[-] NeptuneOrbit@lemmy.world 29 points 5 months ago

It's a joke. It starts off cute and altruistic and then it finishes silly and kind of bad.

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[-] EpicFailGuy@lemmy.world 28 points 5 months ago

some people prefer therapy,

The rest of us just drink until we can't remember why we're stressed.

Don't knock it till you've tried it.

[-] AVincentInSpace@pawb.social 10 points 5 months ago

That sounds like a one way trip to becoming an alcoholic but you do you ig

[-] Vilian@lemmy.ca 51 points 5 months ago

...getting black out is cute?

[-] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 43 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I mean… dunno about you, but I look my best with that sweet patina of sweat glistening on my forehead, a drop of drool meandering towards my chin, and a hot load in my drawers.

I may not remember some nights, but I rest easy knowing that I’m a damn fine lookin drunk. Too much booze also makes me smell amazing.

Oh, and I’m a great drunk cook too. You can absolutely trust me with that knife.

[-] thefartographer@lemm.ee 13 points 5 months ago

Is that how you got the nickname Half-Pinky-Shit-Pants-Low-Blood-Drunk-Ass-Sally? I always wondered what the subtle inside joke was

[-] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 16 points 5 months ago

Nah, I got that nickname from my preacher one Sunday after church.

[-] mcmoor@bookwormstory.social 42 points 5 months ago

Getting black out together

[-] Khrux@ttrpg.network 17 points 5 months ago

Some of my fondest memories and best bonding experiences are from getting horrendously drunk with somebody. I'm not sure if it's safe for dating because you need to trust the other person to be a decent human being while drunk, but most people are.

If it's just the two of you, or you and strangers you'll never meet again, you'll end up with a better bond from this shared experience, because neither person comes off worse than the other if you're both black out.

Also of course it's not a cute idea? The post is clearly humourous.

[-] ryannathans@aussie.zone 10 points 5 months ago

God yeah lemme hold her hair while she yaks up dinner

[-] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 34 points 5 months ago

The last time I gave blood they wiggled the needle in my vein and gave me the wickedest bruise of my life.

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[-] jodanlime@midwest.social 32 points 5 months ago

I actually did this in my early 20s. Girlfriend at the time got super drunk super fast so I had to stay sober to drive us home.

[-] jaybone@lemmy.world 17 points 5 months ago

You’re not supposed to get drunk at the donations facility.

[-] SanicHegehog@lemm.ee 10 points 5 months ago

If I want to mix vodka into the orange juice afterwards that’s my business.

[-] jodanlime@midwest.social 7 points 5 months ago

They didn't have a sign posted, so I figured I was safe.

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[-] kadu@lemmy.world 22 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Me suspecting my date is actually an Aedes spp. mosquito:

"heeeey so how about after this drink we hit the blood bank? You know, just the two of us and a lot, and I do mean a lot, of blood bags? How about that huh?"

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[-] Ultragigagigantic@lemmy.world 22 points 5 months ago

The whole time I donate I think about the person who pays for it on the other end.

[-] toastal@lemmy.ml 21 points 5 months ago

Staring in the face of late-stage capitalism, the human race tries to find a glimmer of optimism. Can’t afford a real date, find it too hard to connect while sober.

[-] photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Saving lives is pretty hot, but its a shame they don't let you do this if you're gay or use cannabis.

Edit: this is getting out of hand, I do not live in the US. Happy for y'all that do! Although, overall I'm pretty glad not to be living there.

[-] eestileib@sh.itjust.works 30 points 5 months ago

If you're talking about the American Red Cross, they have removed most of the explicitly queerphobic rules. They still ask about high risk activities, but in a non gendered way.

It was kind of insane, though, that 20 years ago I was banned for life for having sucked cock. Turns out I was just boymoding, and as soon as I transitioned cocksucking became just fine for blood donation.

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[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 12 points 5 months ago

WHAT? I've donated blood while high on cannabis.

[-] ExfilBravo@lemmy.world 9 points 5 months ago

Same. Hit the vape right before going in. Whoever gets that blood is probably going to fail a drug test.

[-] importedreality@programming.dev 8 points 5 months ago

The American Red Cross has this on their website:

Q: I'm a heavy cannabis user. Can a transfusion recipient fail a drug test if they receive my blood?

A: No.

They don't care if you're high as a kite as long as it doesn't impair your memory or comprehension (probably for legal reasons).

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[-] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 13 points 5 months ago

This is how Uni kids get drunk on $4 in 1995.

[-] gbuttersnaps@programming.dev 8 points 5 months ago

It's how we did it for $10 in 2012 as well

[-] Sabre363@sh.itjust.works 11 points 5 months ago

This is how we do it for $40 in 2024

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[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 11 points 5 months ago

Cool single idea: donate twice as much blood. Drink all the wine coolers yourself.

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this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2024

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