671
Crypto genius (lemmy.world)
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] eezeebee@lemmy.ca 146 points 9 months ago

"while your investment appreciates in value", hopefully.

[-] Tubics@lemmy.world 39 points 9 months ago

Even if it loses 90% of its value it's still a win if the money came from credit cards you never paid back. Although the couple of hundred bucks you get might not be worth the hassle

[-] Wogi@lemmy.world 13 points 9 months ago

You will also be unable to take out any debt upon release. It's difficult to get credit as a released felon without a history of defaulting on debt.

So, being generous and saying that he sees a 4% return on his investment, he'll have slightly more than he went in owing, and will be completely unable to even get a car loan, a decent job, or place to live.

He will have turned 0 dollars in to a lifetime of hardship.

[-] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 20 points 9 months ago

Correction: He will have turned 0 dollars into a lifetime of hardship and a few hundred dollars.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] saltnotsugar@lemm.ee 123 points 9 months ago

In prison.

Butthole destroyed.

Make check on coin.

Massive loss in value.

No.

[-] GlitterInfection@lemmy.world 88 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Just so you know you don't need to go to prison in order to get your butthole destroyed. It's much easier to just go on Grindr, which is only an emotional prison.

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 23 points 9 months ago

Fun fact you also don't need to go to prison for your crypto to depreciate!

[-] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 22 points 9 months ago

There is a different story here, hidden beneath the floor boards.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Mamertine@lemmy.world 82 points 9 months ago

You'd still owe that debt. Unless you go to prison for live than the debt's statute length. Generally 7 years.

Also some jurisdictions make you pay for the privilege of going to prison.

Ymmv, choose your state of jurisdiction very carefully.

Also crypto is a bubble IMO.

[-] chuckleslord@lemmy.world 30 points 9 months ago

IMO nothing, it's pure speculation powered by nothing but blind greed. If it isn't a bubble, then nothing is.

load more comments (14 replies)
load more comments (5 replies)
[-] walter_wiggles@lemmy.nz 66 points 9 months ago

I think you would make more money if you gave handys behind the Wendy's dumpster every day for 7 years.

[-] Blackmist@feddit.uk 58 points 9 months ago

> Realise you still owe the credit card debt.

[-] Deiv@lemmy.ca 32 points 9 months ago
[-] nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee 18 points 9 months ago

I didn't just say it, I declared it

[-] CADmonkey@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

Just commit a crime with a longer sentence than your state's statute of limitations.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] AgentGrimstone@lemmy.world 51 points 9 months ago

You already fucked up in step 2

[-] AVincentInSpace@pawb.social 48 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Come to that you fucked up in step 1. Do you really think the credit card companies are gonna let that debt just sit there not accruing interest and not send debt collectors to your house while you're in jail?

[-] Kase@lemmy.world 34 points 9 months ago

Not if you sell your house to buy more crypto ;)

[-] Deiv@lemmy.ca 7 points 9 months ago
[-] Chickenstalker@lemmy.world 44 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Let's go one further:

  1. Get turned into a vampire

  2. Buy crypto

  3. Go sleep in your coffin for 100 years

  4. ???

  5. Profit

[-] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 23 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

~~5. Profit~~

  1. Realize it's at 0$

  2. Cry

  3. Remember you bought doge because Elon Musk said so

  4. Cry

[-] Ardiente@ttrpg.network 34 points 9 months ago
[-] PsychedSy@sh.itjust.works 7 points 9 months ago

I mean if I had gone to jail right after I bought any of my crypto I'd be doing better. Sadly, it makes more sense to pull the crypto than default.

I think I had less than a cent of bitcoin and managed to pull 20 later (almost all of it) then another 20 later. Huge percent profit.

[-] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 34 points 9 months ago

You'll have to somehow launder that crypto first.

[-] ryathal@sh.itjust.works 32 points 9 months ago

You probably wouldn't need laundered crypto, but you would need to be able to hide it from the bankruptcy court. This only works if you can clear the credit card debt.

[-] Rin@lemm.ee 8 points 9 months ago

Monero doesn't need to be laundered.

[-] matter@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

It does if you want to spend it in any meaningful way

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[-] Armok_the_bunny@lemmy.world 27 points 9 months ago

What country does anon live in, where prison food and housing is free?

[-] unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 39 points 9 months ago

a country that has any reasonable human rights?? well unless you mean "free" in the general sense in that someone does have to pay for it even if not the prisoner...

[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 27 points 9 months ago

(The shithole states charge prisoners for room and board)

[-] Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 9 months ago
[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 15 points 9 months ago

THE SHITHOLE STATES

CHARGE PRISONERS

FOR BEING IMPRISONED

Sorry I know sometimes you need to yell to be heard through the internet tubes

[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

The internet is not

the internet, is not a big truck

itititit's a series of TUBES

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] HipsterTenZero@dormi.zone 11 points 9 months ago

What do they do if you dont pay? throw you in double prison?

[-] sag@lemm.ee 19 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I know someone who did this. Now, He is in Loss.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

the IRS TAXMAN finds out and resizes anons rectum in search of the missing funds

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Crack0n7uesday@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

Someone actually did this, then built a nuclear fallout shelter in their backyard in the middle of some city, but he did it all redneck and it blew up or something while building an underground generator or something and killed a 17 year old kid, he went back to jail, got out after another crypto spike, tried to cash out and immediately got sued by the family of the dead kid for wrongful death and got sued by the IRS for back taxes. It's a fucking rabbit hole of a story.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago
[-] yamapikariya@lemmyfi.com 24 points 9 months ago

Fast and easy way to contract a disease. Wouldn't recommend

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
671 points (96.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26233 readers
271 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS