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submitted 4 months ago by lemmylem@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

I just got ghosted by the girl I was talking to, I want to find another girl to talk to. This girl and I met at the gym, but I don't want to be the guy that goes to the gym just to meet girls. I mean sure there's the bar and Tinder, but I want a real relationship. I mean, I guess it'll come to me.

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[-] platypode@sh.itjust.works 57 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

I had absolutely no luck trying. I went on dates, swiped apps, talked to every girl I thought was cute, and none of it went anywhere beyond some weird halfhearted relationships. About two weeks after I gave up altogether, I met a girl on my way to the water fountain and we just clicked. Six years down the line and we couldn't be happier.

I guess my best advice is just don't sweat it. Be yourself, do what makes you happy, put yourself in situations where you'll meet new people, and sooner or later somebody will come along.

[-] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 24 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

I think people are too quick to discount this advice but it's honestly the best way to find a genuine life partner. Do stuff you love and if you find someone you're interested in doing it (and they feel the same way) you have an excellent basis for a relationship.

[-] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 5 points 4 months ago

And if that fails, if you do hobbies you love with other people, at least you'll make new friends.

[-] GreyEyedGhost@lemmy.ca 16 points 4 months ago

Nothing is less attractive than the stink of desperation. I said the same thing to a friend of mine. He was out of a relationship and looking for a new one. Within 6 months of not trying to find someone and just enjoying his life, there she was.

[-] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

About two weeks after I gave up altogether, I met a girl on my way to the water fountain and we just clicked

I just have to say thank you for posting this, as I was just commenting earlier today how I got together with my (now) wife after giving up and focusing on myself. I really appreciate seeing that my experience isn't a one off like I've been told before (which is amusing because I've had it happen multiple times since).

this post was submitted on 06 May 2024
129 points (93.9% liked)

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