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What's an immediate turn off in a person?
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
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In the romantic sense, someone that seems dumb or childish. I just can't go there without some sense of being a peer.
The opposite for me tbh, someone who can't let loose and have some stupid fun every so often isn't my bag.
There's a difference between goofy and dumb. Goofy is fun, I'm all over that. Actually dumb is exhausting and awkward, it's just not fun
Sure, but "dumb and childish" to me conveys "dumb as in goofy" rather than "dumb as in a bag of rocks," and that is why I responded with disagreement related to such. The operative word here is really "childish," tbh. They go on to say that they are not good at letting loose, but also clarify that they meant "low intelligence." It is unclear if they perceive goofy fun as a sign of low intelligence in and of itself.
In any case, arguing the semantics of the phrase "dumb and childish" doesn't meet my definition of fun lol. Like I said "different strokes," people can like different things and I think that is wonderful tbh.
That makes sense and that's fair
OP here again. I don't. I just don't get at least some forms of it. I have been known to do some good pranks, but most other things people classify as "letting loose" aren't my jam. I'm more of a books and tea person.
Originally I was thinking of people I've known that literally made me feel like I was talking to a child. I don't know what that is, exactly, but low intelligence is a decent guess. Oh well, I'll try different wording if it ever comes up again.
Yeah, not my best wording.
A stick up the ass isn't the exact same thing as low intelligence or whatever this turnoff is, but then again I'm not good at let-loose stupid fun, so maybe I'm biased.
Either way, more left for me, as they say, as long as everyone's having a good consensual time.
Hear hear, different strokes.
I would agree unless the looseness and stupidity is caused by alcohol. In that case is a huge red flag.
I'm still in the middle there, sometimes is fine but if it's the only way or all the time it's a problem.
Ok, I get that you don't like stupid people, but you shouldn't judge people solely on how they act. You can act like a child and be a intelligent and a competent person.
I have a sister who I'm close with, who has all kinds of dinosaur-themed stuff and loves it. That's not the issue. It was a poor choice of wording I guess to describe it that way. I had an exchange recently where I literally felt like I was talking to a kid after a while, though, and all thoughts of romance were immediately dead, so that was my first thought.
The way people act is the interface with which you interact with them. It makes little difference if what lurks behind is an intelligent person or a child if they both behave the same.
I'd say it's impossible to do it I any other way. We're not telepaths and intent is not magic.