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The new girl
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 08 May 2024
-33 points (39.9% liked)
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Is it transphobic to not be into trans people? But I agree, the cartoon seems a bit ... dusty.
No, but that guy on the right has no idea what Randie is “into.” This is a classic example of a transphobic joke.
“You’re not going to like this” means the situation is bad. Not like, incompatible bad, but… gay bad.
Exactly this. Everyone has their own preferences and judging a person as a good/bad fit solely based on their gender identity and not any sort of subjective compatibility is fundamentally transphobic. It's assessing that trans people are objectively undesirable. Pretty messed up.
Well put.
I don't want to date a dude.
First: don't be a loser. Refer to trans women as women. Or are you a captive to your barbaric past?
Second: you're allowed to have a preference, but projecting your preference onto the world is transphobic. Making a joke that implies all trans people are undesirable to everyone is transphobic and self-centered.
You can be a better person than this. Give it a try. Otherwise you'll be left behind as a relic of a less civilized time
Which is why you state your preference for genitalia in a partner. It’s okay if you don’t want to date a trans individual, but don’t go acting like your preference is the only valid choice.
They are.
Objectively? That's a lie. I know plenty of folks who love their trans gf.
So love and desire are the same now? I'm gonna tell all my friends.
You don't have any to tell
It's sad that nobody will ever feel either for you.
Hurr hurr, ya got me good! /s
I understood it as "unfortunately she must have been a visitor, she doesn't work here".
Randie said "I have to find her." I'd take that as evidence he's into her, or at the very least wants to see her again, regardless of his gender preferences.
I have no idea how any of the characters shown in this comic being transgender would impact anything. Doubly so considering if the girl who walked past Randie both exists and is trans, that would mean she has transitioned with regards to her appearance but her employer both has not updated their database to reflect her transition and (assuming that lack of update was for ideological reasons rather than "IT is too lazy" reasons, which I would assume a trans woman would apply pressure to) has not transphobically fired her. While not strictly speaking impossible, I find this far less likely than that Randie simply imagined the woman, or that one of his male-identifying coworkers had dressed in drag to mess with him.
Oh yeah. These two guys who work together know nothing about each other. /s
Seriously quit fishing for shit to be upset about.
No one at work knows I like to fuck FTM.
Well good for you. You're not a character in a comic strip where the author decides the conditions of the characters.
Looking at your comment history, it’s clear you’re a woman hating incel. It’s no wonder this comic appeals to you.
Ahhh you're one of those people. Congrats on your misery. I hope you enjoy the feeling of superiority of being unable to comprehend that some people aren't interested in dudes who look like girls.
You're so close to getting it. You literally just used the phrase "some people" and still can't grasp why the joke is transphobic for making a broad generalization about the desirability of trans women.
Because you're exactly right: some people don't. But other people do. Which is why the joke is transphobic for implying that the reader will immediately agree it's "bad news".
And don't give me some shit about the author and their characters because you and I both know that these are one-offs and the joke is "uh oh you got duped that girl is actually a guy hahaha"
They’re never going to get there ;)
Yeah, their truly bigoted attitude came out down that so I just blocked and reported xD
Probably for the best. Those people can’t keep a lid on it for long.
Trans people are very broadly undesirable. Most people wanna make babies with a healthy specimen of the opposite sex. Trans people scream physical and psychological trouble.
Also yeah, the joke is obviously that he got duped. Idk why you're not all singing the praises about how effective the conversion is and whatnot.
And now you've entered the territory of labeling trans people as psychologically troubled. Clearly you're just a bigot.
Muted and reported for blatant bigotry. Nobody wants you around. Enjoy your isolation
They ARE troubled. You think they're gonna get the snip snip for a state of being they're totally ok with? Fuckin listen to yourself. Build 4 walls out of dicks around yourself and call ME isolated. 🤣
But I can comprehend it. That’s the whole thing. Being able to understand that other people have different interests than me and being totally cool with it.
So I hope you enjoy the feeling of inferiority because you are totally unable to comprehend that some people are not interested in the same things you are.
As just a general rule? Yes.
Having preference for specific sex characteristics is one thing, but there are trans people who are indistinguishable from cis people. If you're attracted to someone and then pretend you aren't simply based on the fact that they're trans that's transphobic.
It would be like being attracted to someone and then finding out they're part Domican or something and suddenly acting like it's some deal breaker because "I'm not attracted to Dominican people".
You're entitled to that preference, but it's still a racist one.
There are millions of things that are relationship dealbreakers for people. I can't see myself loving another man, that doesn't make me homophobic, it just makes me straight.
And yet if you were attracted to a specific man you met it wouldn't make sense to deny that based on you not being attracted to men generally or some kind of political identity. No one is going to force a person to act on that attraction, but it's still a form of denial to pretend it doesn't exist.
People are entitled to whatever dealbreakers they have, that doesn't preclude some of those dealbreakers from being based on prejudice or false beliefs.
You previously said it's transphobic "If you're attracted to someone and then pretend you aren't simply based on the fact that they're trans" and I don't quite agree.
Say, for example, that I, a straight man, am attracted to a woman. After a while I discover that she's gay. I'm attracted to her, but I may pretend not to be given the situation. That doesn't make me homophobic, I'm just making a decision based on information.
Edit: just to be clear, I'm happy to have a discussion, but if what I'm saying is causing offense or upsetting you, I'll stop. I just want it to be clear that I have no intention of "winning" the conversation. :-)
That has to do with her attraction though, not yours. You would be being respectful of her preference (good), but your attraction to her simply is a reality, just as her intrinsic inability to be attracted to you is also a reality. Likewise, if a gay woman sleeps with a trans woman because she's attracted to all her feminine qualities, it doesn't make her any less gay.
The discussion is not offensive to me, I should clarify that when I talk about someone's beliefs being transphobic I'm not passing judgement on them as people, they aren't bad human beings, from my point of view it's simply a prejudice that's absorbed culturally. People don't seriously examine it until they are put into a situation where they have to actually make a intellectual choice. A lot of people, I would say the majority of us, have these kinds of latent biases that we never really bother to pick apart and instead just act on in a kneejerk way.
A person's sexuality is distinct from their capacity to be attracted to trans people, it doesn't make sense to state it as a preference in and of itself.
I'm going to unpack a thing here, bear with me, here is why I see the two things as distinct; If you met someone and were very attracted to them, you got along great, even went so far as starting a romantic/sexual relationship. Maybe you're even together for years. One day they confide to you that they are fully transitioned -- your response to that is not actually going to be about your attraction to trans people. Your attraction to them was already concretely established, it's no longer a question.
People might make arguments about "Well I wouldn't want someone to keep something like that from me" or something along those lines, but that still doesn't have to do with the person being trans or not -- it has to do with value judgements concerning honesty, trust and openness etc. Which are characteristics independent of gender identity.
Or, if it helps to think of it another way; if you date someone who has not transitioned, and then they come out to you as trans, you cannot then retrospectively claim to have not been attracted to them simply because that fact came to light. You might lose attraction to them going forward from that point because their body may change to become more feminine/masculine, but it's not because of their having a status as being trans. Just like your attraction to a gay woman doesn't change based on the fact that they're gay.
These are scenarios that could potentially happen with a trans person, but it would not happen between two cis people. A completely straight cis man is never going to inadvertantly fall in love with another cis man and have a relationship with him without understanding it as being a bi/gay relationship, this is the difference.
The blanket belief that one simply cannot be attracted to trans people is misleading. I would go further to say that belief is a roundabout way of obligating trans people to live not as their target gender, but to forever live as an "Other". It's a conception of transness that functions on stereotypes and requires them to perpetually qualify their relationships to other people for their entire lives based on that medical history, regardless of whether or not those people percieve that they are trans or not.
It's a way of saying "It doesn't matter if you pass perfectly, or even if I find you attractive, you're still required to out yourself and can never actually let go of that old identity." Which, to me, seems unfair and is sort of an insidious manifestation of the trope that trans people are being dishonest and deceptive, that they "fool" people into being attracted to them rather than people simply being attracted to them naturally.
Thanks for taking the time to make your point so clearly. I agree with everything you said there.
Perhaps I had the point wrong when I joined the discussion. :-)
heterosexual != !homosexual