You should try to explain to the family why you weren't there (if they'll listen)

But honestly if they're being so petty of you missing 1 party it might be time to look more deeply at the kind of relationships you have with them

Personally I haven't seen most of my relatives in years due to a great many of them being really shitty people or being complacent when those shittier relatives are being shitty. And it's been pretty nice how much my stress levels have gone down during the holidays.

Family is the relationship, relatives are blood. Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they're family.