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Dating
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2023
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Can't really relate, because I am only 24yo. Rant incoming;
Though I am sort of reluctant to try dating. In the past, I tried dating apps but they yielded no results. The women I matched with all ghosted me. Really did a number on my self-esteem. Who knows? Maybe I've got the face for radio?
And in all honesty, it feels like I've got to abide by ridiculous standards. The likes of being buff and tall, owning a car and house, a 6-figure salary, etc. I am still studying and trying to get my bachelor degree. All of these requirements put a ton of pressure on me. Is every woman looking for that? Of course not—that's not what I am implying. But from my personal experience it's certainly starting to feel that way.
Not surprised why redpill content is booming. They're not right, but there is truth to be found in some of their statements. In the end, I do introspection to identify my flaws and improve on myself. Nevertheless, even by doing all of that it feels like it's never enough.
It's important to understand that being on dating apps is not the same as dating in real life. We often see people in more superficial ways on apps and judge them in a way we wouldn't necessarily do in real life.
Women looking at men that way in dating apps is definitely a reflection on how they do in real life but it's amplified quite a bit.
Men are the same. How many times have you swiped left on a girl just because you didn't think she was attractive? She seemed really cool and like someone you'd get along with but she just wasn't attractive.
This again is a reflection on how men view women in real life but amplified. In real life you wouldn't be that harsh.
It's important to stay grounded and remember that everyone is just a stupid human who thinks they know what they want and may put high expectations on someone but often doesn't take a moment to think 'Am I all that though?'
Zero times. Always swiped right to increase my chance of getting matches. Didn't use some hookup app the likes of Tinder either. Used OkCupid since I heard good stories of it at the time.
I am well aware I may be an outlier. I know other men certainly do swipe left.
Though I agree with your points. After all, we're all thinking like troglodytes at times. We set unrealistic expectations. Think social media skewed our views of what's realistic and what is not.